Say What?

Narcs love to confuse you. They also start many sentences with: “You never…” example: ” say I love you back, take my hand first, tell me things you should,” etc. The other day I told my partner that the doctor called back and what he said. When I mentioned it two days later he said: “You never told me that.”

When I told him that I most certainly did and told him he was watching a game on TV, he said: “Well you should know better than to tell me anything important when I’m into a game. Yet when he’s talking I have to stop what I’m doing and look at him.

He tells me I’m unorganized yet he has a filing cabinet that has files from a 20 year ago failed business in it and his recent papers are piled all over his living room. He tells me everything to say when I’m on the phone like I’m a two year old and he asks the same questions over and over when I let him talk to the person on the phone.

He has anxiety and depression but rather than take anything for it he just gets loud and makes an idiot out of himself saying the same thing over and over or asking the same questions over and over. If it’s me who has upset him he just threatens: “I’ve never had a woman who did that or acted like that and I should just dump your ass!” Then in 10 minutes he’s calling me “honey” and acting as if nothing happened.

My health has never been worse as far as migraines, stomach aches, and other somatic ailments are concerned. Some days I can barely get through the day. I’ve had a migraine for two days because we were broke down 2 days out of town 4 hours away and he left me at the shop where the car was being fixed all day long while he walked the town. The reason? I would understand better what the mechanics were saying than he would. Anytime there is dirty work I get stuck doing it.

He writes down my transgressions and I found a piece of paper today that he had written down things about me that made me furious. Things like: “She lays around and smokes cigars. She’s unorganized, jealous, etc.” First off I smoke a Swisher Sweet once in a great while. I’m not allowed to clean in his aparment because he doesnt like the way I clean. I can’t get him to mount my TV so I have to watch TV at his apartment and I’m not gonna stand up and watch it. I do all the cleaning that’s done in his place, all the shopping, he makes me wash all the recycle with soap, yet he says all i do is lay around. One just never knows what a Narc’s going to say next does one?

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I am a published author on dementia and a survivor of narcissistic abuse. This site is designed to help you identify narcissists and their trademarks and the pitfalls to avoid.

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