Here are examples of a narcs word salad lies and discrepancies. When I don’t do something he thinks i should instinctively do or we have a squabble, he will say: well this one always did that. She could read me like a book.” Or, “I’ve never had a woman argue over the things you do!” “You sit there like a retard, what’s wrong with you? I’ve always dated intelligent women not nut cases.”
When I’m angry or thinking I have always stared into the distance which he said shows a weak character. It’s not that. Its if I have to sit there and look at his smirk I’m gonna wanna slap the shit out of him. I have a terrible temper and rather than get loud and mouthy like he does I have my own ways of keeping it under check.
His first fiancee’ who he was a business partner with started doing illegal things in their business and because he was too busy running around the country racing his dogs and going to strip clubs, he swears he didn’t know what was going on and they both got a felony out of it. He told me once that he had heard nothing from her in years and that wasn’t like her. He then told me the other night that he hadn’t seen or heard from her since she moved out of their house in the early 1990’s so which is it?
Enter the second fiancee’. They lived together 9 years and she just up and left with no explanation. He said they seldom fought but that she was a pathological liar who embarrassed him all the time with her stupid stretches of the truth for no reason. But he gave me a phone to use when mine was broken for a few days that had messages from her on it mentioning how he called her at work on a recorded line screaming and cussing at her. How he lied, cheated, and stole from her. How she had been emotionally out of the relationship for years but couldn’t get away from him until she retired.
Then his last GF before me who he was with for 5 months he said they never argued then two weeks later told me how she had a fit when he was putting her air conditioning in the window and threw down the directions and dropped it on his finger spraining it. All the behaviors of his he projects on me during therapy and I saw a message on the phone where he did that with his 9 year fiancee’. Add ADD, OCD, anxiety, depression, and an aversion to gainful employment and you have a relationship mess. I dont know where this relationship will go. It’s difficult where affairs of the heart are concerned. Be blessed. Love and light.